Gabrielle Union opens up about her struggle with infertility

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Gabrielle Union recently opened up about her struggle with infertility. In her new book, We’re Going to Need More Wine, the 44-year-old actress writes about multiple miscarriages, IVP treatments, and her continued hope to conceive with her NBA star husband Dwyane Wade.

In the excerpt, obtained exclusively by PEOPLE, Union details her journey, “I have had eight or nine miscarriages,” Union, 44, writes in the book. “For three years, my body has been a prisoner of trying to get pregnant — I’ve either been about to go into an IVF cycle, in the middle of an IVF cycle, or coming out of an IVF cycle.”

The pair married in August 2014 and Union admits she never considered motherhood until she became a stepmom. Helping to raise Wade’s nephew and two sons from a previous marriage ignited her desire to have a baby. Wade’s third son, conceived with another woman while Union and Wade were broken up, lives with his mother.

“I never wanted kids,” she tells PEOPLE. “Then I became a stepmom, and there was no place I’d rather be than with them.”

Union hopes her honesty will change the way people approach her about the topic of motherhood and children.

“For so many women, and not just women in the spotlight, people feel very entitled to know, ‘Do you want kids?’” she says. “A lot of people, especially people that have fertility issues, just say ‘no’ because that’s a lot easier than being honest about whatever is actually going on. People mean so well, but they have no idea the harm or frustration it can cause.”

We’re Going to Need More Wine hits shelves October 17.

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